Monday, December 28, 2009

top ten movies of 2009...

according to imdb and rotten tomatoes, i've seen 32 of the 100 top grossing movies of 2009.
yeah, so roughly, using my calculator watch, i've pumped somewhere in the neighborhood of $700-$800 into regal cinema's stock. yikes.
it's a conservative number considering all the rasinets i eat.
here's a list of my top ten for the year. these aren't in any certain order, unless they are.

star trek. i was worried jj abrams was going to blow this one by hanging leonard nimoy's 107 year old corpse out to dry. i believe it's called jumping the shark, not sure. however, he pulled it off. the story itself with eric bana's character was a little weak, but the dialouge and acting done by the new crew was great. great casting. i love that the director didn't live inside the box . it's great that, after throwing the new crew into bascially an alternate universe...anything is possible. live long and prosper, nerds.

avatar. i didn't let the hype get to me. i wasn't invested. i didn't let myself read any of the early reviews, which resulted in being pleasantly happy with the outcome. firstly, the 3D wasn't captian eo over-the-top. it was subtle, contained in the screen mostly, and provided a very cool depth.
the story has been bashed around a bit, but i didn't feel it brought the movie down. in fact i appreciate a movie that can, while you're watching it, entertain you so much your mind doesn't wander thinking of its real world influences. that being said, the native american, raping mother earth, human greed plot was overflowing. did anyone else notice the scar on the bad guy's face was basically in the shape of a W, as in that dubya?
so, political crap aside, it was a great movie. not one i will run out right away and see again, but it will definetly look cool on blu-ray.

hangover. mike tyson. check. zach galifianakis. check. winner.

inglorious basterds. loved it. the best and only example i need to describe why this movie was truly great...the basement bar scene. wow, a true movie nerd could write a master's thesis on this scene alone.
considering that scene, my man-crush on brad pitt, and this guy:

it would be nearly impossible for this movie to not be great.

district 9. can't wait for the sequel. i hope there's a sequel. there better be a sequel. great story. great sfx. i told people, and by people, i mean other nerds, to go see this movie for the awesome alien weapons alone.
they were sick.

watchmen. this movie came out in 2009? ok.
i wasn't a huge fan of the comic book. it had its moments, but i struggled through it. i understand it's place in the world of nerdom, but it wasn't the loaf of sliced bread some goons were calling it.
however, the movie held up.
subtract a few minutes of staring at dr. manhattan's giant blue penis and you got a top three movie.

mr fox. brilliant. see previous post.

moon. every once and a while a science fiction movie is able to sneak up on me. this one did. great story. great acting. it did a lot without attempting to have a james cameron v. michael bay cock fight.

the hurt locker. this one might win an oscar.

i couldn't come up with a tenth. nothing else seemed worthy...discuss.

Saturday, December 26, 2009

it's like a big ship and the water's on fire...



tom waits was speaking of new york city. however, i think, to be more specific, he was describing the condition of my liver after a nice little weekend visit to this violent island.
went to visit chewy, the midget sausage king of new york.
check a blazer game at the garden.
but mostly slept off all the pain from the nights before on nigel's couch.
the evenings and early mornings were numb. the late mornings and afternoons were disgusting.
brocephus jimbo's still hasn't cleaned their tap lines, however the remodeled bathroom was lovely.
it was like i'd never left.
it was balls cold, but my scorching o-ring kept me warm.




Tuesday, December 1, 2009

kids' movies are great.

an 87 minute grin. go see it.


Friday, November 6, 2009

idiot.

this video gets good around the -2:50 mark:

Friday, October 30, 2009

hooray! amy got boobies!

still disgusting.

ho. ly. shit.



i'm trying to think of something witty to say about mabry hunting squirrels in the yard...but i'm speechless after watching this video.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

on like donkey kong...

RIP CITY!

japan. it continues to be awesome...

doritos.



no upper-deckers allowed. bummer.



AND...the hand dryers are awesome.



no clue???



two girls, one squid. actually it looks like a couple different squid, but i'm no marine psychologist.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

this was pretty cool...



solving the world's problems...

1. use the guy that inspired mark walhberg's character in the movie shooter to take out all insane dictators or anyone else that has nuclear weapons and shouldn't.*

2. impose instant capital punishment for child molesters and murderers.

3. make wind and solar energy cost effective so that all dams may be removed. i mean the wind blows pretty hard through the gorge? everyday. since before the dinosaurs.

4. devise a way to medically permit fertility only after responsible parties pass a series a common sense tests.*

5. join this cause and sign this petition: i like to fish this river



*to be determined by me.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Sunday, October 18, 2009

the ol' click 'n paul, er pawl...

this...



leads to this...



which leads to this...

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

just another night at GK...

nba jam, ms. pacman, kong, and "...the wizard needs food badly!"
these are a few of my favorite things.
the one, the only GK.
happy birthday pletsch-zilla.



Thursday, October 8, 2009

956 miles later...



i love fishing.

i'll drive a long, long way for that first two or three hours of sunlight creeping over the rimrock. i'll brush my teeth with some chocolate doughnuts and mountain dew. then i'll quietly, carefully hike down a dark, jagged riverbank wearing a headlamp.

i'm quite certain the fish can hear me shut the door on the truck, silence is key.

i find a nice boulder. then settle in behind it, so i can barely feel the current. the green water is moving at the perfect speed at the perfect depth. it's that mystic shit that those knobby-knuckled old timers shake their wading staffs at. it's that religous shit that lets me forget about work and focus only on the swing, those deer bouncing up the canyon wall, and maybe that doves song i had playing on the ipod while rigging up.

there's never wind at sunrise. and my casts are cutting the water like a surgeon. no, it's more like esteban the guitar wizard, since i refuse to use the surgeon analogy because most surgeons are dicks. it's precise but relaxed. it's intense but my heart rate goes down. it's that wonderful feeling of fighting off the urge to hit that ugly, ugly snooze button and hooking into an early morning steelface.

now on to the usual shots of scenery, wildlife, fishagirl, and fishadogs.















clam feed.

small town folk like to gather in fire stations, vfw halls, or middle school gymnasiums and consume mass quantities of grub...

before.



during.


after.

Monday, September 28, 2009

pike.



we did a fly-out from willow to a not so secret lake for some northerns. it was a quick 20 minute flight on calm bluebird day. we got dropped off at the lake and threw a tiny 2 hp motor on our skinny boat. we loaded up, headed to the nearest weed line, and started chucking our froggy-looking topwater lures. within seconds they started smacking it. hook-ups were tough (i did way better after switching over to the fly rod and throwing a white bunny leech) and the fish were mostly hammer handles, but we saw some 4 footers swim by.
maybe another day.
i need my pilot license.







Tuesday, September 22, 2009

awesome site.

explosions and boobs.

the internet continues to reaffirm my faith in humanity. i dare you to click refresh less than 10 times. per hour. per week. until your next birthday.
thanks, saggy.
and you're welcome, world.

Friday, September 18, 2009

"shit, dude, that's a choker bowski!"

holy hell! now THIS is why i went to alaska!
this group of photos, to me, is pretty much the, um, climax of my trip. so, i'll keep posting, but you'll should just know it don't, no, can't get any better. click here.

this was a pretty sweet morning.

thanks to cam miller for the angles.









Wednesday, September 16, 2009

more.



good god, i'm so sick of looking at my ugly mug. i'm think i should start pasting megan fox's face on my body?
anyway, if you like pescapornographia and can tolerate some more of my grill, here's some more shots from the middle of the week on the ktok. click here.