Saturday, November 27, 2010

two thumbs up!

strong work bishops!
tattoo'd women and SAVE BRISTOL BAY?
Now that's how you run a business.

bo pelini is an angry man.

you best stop censoring him, dr. tom.
never has such a tall glass of piss and vinegar tasted so sweet.
go big red!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

bravo, sir. bravo.

anthony hopkins, daniel day-lewis, keanu reeves, val kilmer, and, possibly the greatest of all-time, nicolas cage.
we are lucky witnesses to greatness.
slow clap, nic...slow clap, sir.

i can't play that video and not pull this classic scene out of the vault.
i give you the greatest scene and accent in the history of hollywood:

never leave us, nic. i know you won't.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

greg oden is soft.

saw nic batum today. i told him to tell rich cho to tell brandon to tell greg to use some of his millions and buy some tony robbins self-esteem dvds and then stop being such a pussy and actually act like you want to be a basketball player.
i had enough of oden's mopey-dopey, chin-down bullshit last year.
this so-called "great work ethic" that the blazer brass talk about seems like a bunch of crap from what i can see and/or read about.
prove me wrong, greg.

my list of things greg should've done to prove to blazer fans he gives a shit about being a great player or even slightly begin to live up to the huge amount of potential you had four years ago:

1. find a mentor. a RECENTLY retired NBA big man. someone to teach you toughness and moves. charles oakley comes to mind. jesus, befriend one of these guys, reach out. you can't tell me that even if they are employed by another team, in the off-season patrick ewing or hakeem wouldn't give out some lessons. RIP maurice lucas, but we all know he wasn't 100% for the last few years. why joel doesn't slap greg into shape is beyond me?
2. find a mean-streak. get tougher. join a boxing gym for shitsake. anything would be better than laying on your under-sized couch at home. if you were cleared to lift and jog, you can punch a bag or spar a midget or something.
3. travel with the team. i've heard a bunch of different excuses on this one. but perception is reality on this one. last year no one saw greg. "flying is bad for his knees"...bullshit. the blazers can take a few seats out of Blazer One and install a massage table for him for all i care. no reason not to be on the road with the team rehabbing, watching tape, being coached, developing with teammates...learning the game.
4. relax. don't you get it that if it was better known that you really were kicking ass at rehabbing no one would have anything to say. except that even though you are injured, you are still busting your ass and earning that huge contract. being a head-case or being "depressed", as i've heard, is no excuse. you are a multi-million dollar athlete, your life is just fine.
5. want it. just want it, man. if i felt like you wanted it, everything would be ok. the drive. prove to me that you have it. i'm a sponge to every video and interview i can find and not once have i ever heard you talk like a winner, like winning is all that matters, like losing makes you throw up, like second place is last place, like winning is all that matters. not once.

anyway, yeah, i saw nic batum today. i like his game.

Friday, November 19, 2010

nice earring, douche.

go make another jar-jar binks indiana jones movie, harrison.
han solo was as cool as you'll ever be.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

wooly bugger.

yeah, that's my first bug. pretty complicated, i know. but i'll be whipping up sexy pink fish tacos in no time...

moss man.

going south for the next few weeks so the good folks at caddis fly can teach me to tie some bugs. i've been putting off learning for too long. i blame call of duty. we got in some home-cooking and some fishing.

i hiked in looking for sasquatch again. i didn't find him. but i did see something odd. my eyes were wet and bloody from the thickest forest of blackberry bushes in the northwest, but i managed one decent picture from a distance:

i told him i wasn't interested in his recent deer kill and he let me go with a warning.
then i caught a couple nice fish.
and ate some dairy queen.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010