Tuesday, June 30, 2009


good times in STL.
however, 100 degree heat with 99% humidity...not fun.
fighting off heat stroke is very, very difficult with beer.
congrats, matty.
the highlights: albert pujols doing his usual, not getting shivved at pops at 6am, imo's, and syberg's wings.
the low lights: just the heat.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Sunday, June 21, 2009

happy baby daddy day.

don't you just want one?

Friday, June 19, 2009

t-minus 60-ish days until...

1. i sleep in my waders.
2. bows on mice.
3. pollywogs.
4. not being at work.
5. the river i've been dreaming about for 2 years.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009


so simon's over the other day talking about "dude, rockets this and rockets that. you should do this rocket thing with us. it's more awesome than a neil diamond concert. chicks love it. it's power and speed and fuel all wrapped into a nugget of sick and twisted carnage dangling from a GI Joe-sized parachute."
the next day i got the text message designating the coordinates for the LZ.
however, sadly, i had to skip out.
i went fishing or had to brush out the dog or something? here's what i missed:

Monday, June 15, 2009

high lakes.

we kicked around in the float tubes yesterday until the wind started howling. i need a 3 weight. i also need to invent a beer stringer to drag behind the tube. and i need waders with a zipper. kicking back to shore to piss...sucks.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Saturday, June 6, 2009

ho. ly. shit.

Obama beach woulda sucked. thanks, brave men.

pull the knife outta my back, please...

dear kelly mc gillis,
why don't you just take a big crap in my back to the future lunchbox while you're at it...?
Oh, you're so done with men?
Well, I'm sooo done with blue-haired top gun instructors.
I mean, you had to go and one up the volleyball scene in the most awesome val kilmer movie EVER*! i hate you.

*excluding tombstone.


Friday, June 5, 2009


big bird: "you wanna stay over this morning? we're down four nurses."
cookie monster: "i don't wanna, but i will."
big bird: "i'll make sure you have easy kids."
cookie monster: "so easy that i can just sleep in an empty patient room until i have to be back in 8 hours?"
big bird: "no. so does that mean you won't stay?"
cookie monster: "no. i'll stay. i have to pay for alaska in a couple months."

this is the worst blog ever.

i've been busy.