stl.

good times in STL.
however, 100 degree heat with 99% humidity...not fun.
fighting off heat stroke is very, very difficult with beer.
congrats, matty.
the highlights: albert pujols doing his usual, not getting shivved at pops at 6am, imo's, and syberg's wings.
the low lights: just the heat.

MCOTW.

happy baby daddy day.

don't you just want one?

t-minus 60-ish days until...

1. i sleep in my waders.
2. bows on mice.
3. pollywogs.
4. not being at work.
5. the river i've been dreaming about for 2 years.

rockets!

so simon's over the other day talking about "dude, rockets this and rockets that. you should do this rocket thing with us. it's more awesome than a neil diamond concert. chicks love it. it's power and speed and fuel all wrapped into a nugget of sick and twisted carnage dangling from a GI Joe-sized parachute."
the next day i got the text message designating the coordinates for the LZ.
however, sadly, i had to skip out.
i went fishing or had to brush out the dog or something? here's what i missed:

high lakes.

we kicked around in the float tubes yesterday until the wind started howling. i need a 3 weight. i also need to invent a beer stringer to drag behind the tube. and i need waders with a zipper. kicking back to shore to piss...sucks.

d.

it was a busy weekend...

ho. ly. shit.

Obama beach woulda sucked. thanks, brave men.

pull the knife outta my back, please...

dear kelly mc gillis,
why don't you just take a big crap in my back to the future lunchbox while you're at it...?
Oh, you're so done with men?
Well, I'm sooo done with blue-haired top gun instructors.
I mean, you had to go and one up the volleyball scene in the most awesome val kilmer movie EVER*! i hate you.



*excluding tombstone.

MCOTW.

zzzz.

big bird: "you wanna stay over this morning? we're down four nurses."
cookie monster: "i don't wanna, but i will."
big bird: "i'll make sure you have easy kids."
cookie monster: "so easy that i can just sleep in an empty patient room until i have to be back in 8 hours?"
big bird: "no. so does that mean you won't stay?"
cookie monster: "no. i'll stay. i have to pay for alaska in a couple months."

this is the worst blog ever.

i've been busy.